*rolls gueritol down a hill*

well i think we'r gana need more people to occupie us if we turn out to do well in our other clan games think the big bad BOS could save a spot

Im up for an arse kicking by bos lol

BoS is a gentle clan. We gently relieve you of all your possessions and buildings so you don't feel any pain or unhappiness. In fact, you'll be happy to turn everything over to us just so you won't have to be bothered by the hard, difficult tasks of managing your lands and people. We will gladly do all that for you and your friends. We are a full service clan!

And all that, with easy and accessibly payment terms. What more can anybody ask!?

>=0) <-scary evil clown <

Biscuit,

The above proposal is tempting... I have always felt that the Dog Soldiers Clan has had too much of everything - and we are all considering a minimalist lifestyle.

Jmac
D~S

It was yet another boring clown seminar, people were talking about the newest high-tech clown tricks and I was sitting in a back row half asleep. Suddenly, curly Mog took the stage with breaking news, visibly excited. You could barely see his red nose from all his Latin-long hairstyle. He proudly announces that yet again the CoC family is shooting for the top and volunteers are needed. The word is out that our arch-enemies BoS are sharpening their stainless steel gardening tools and that they are looking for a fight with anyone, like all bullies do. As soon as Mog finished, everyone could clearly see Neb (aka always-ready-for-war) as he eagerly jumped from his seat and started chanting and flexing his muscles. Coopels-the vise was the next one to stand up, he did it in a much calmer fashion but one could sense the power irradiating from him, sitting on his motorised freshly bought, newest-end clown-tricycle. Touched by the braveness of my fellow clowns, I dusted off my old war clown-suite, exchanged the water that was in the joke-flower on my suite with something more appropriate for battle (got it from a chemistry shop ) and then stood up honking that fearsome clown joke-horn saying: I am ready!

Tricycle?!?!? I only ride unicycles....

Ahhh I thought those were additional 2 cycles but they were actually turbo power. It happens with a new tech, you never know what are those tnew thingies...

Tricles?, unicycles?, water spouting flowers?

I want my mommy!

OK, how about this, CoC has me, Coopels, Neb and Nikolak, plus a guest appearance by vj121 (who we are mutually inspecting) versus whatevah mess of kitchen help BoS can dredge up, on the Forgotten Paradise map? I can host it, it will be unranked, 1 turn a day, regular resources.

web.mac.com/johnoco/iWeb/WaronlineMaps/Forgotten%20Paradise.html

There's a nice image of the map. So, is BoS "ready" as the name of the thread implies or are they "weasels" and not ready?

I think That TRK might be able to field a team as well

BoS says they are "ready" for a clan camp... but they want two more weeks to get around to it... I understand they are scared of us, with good reason, but could we possibly move it up a bit?

A tiny car zooms down the street, weaving to the left and the right as if trying to pass every car on the street...but there are no other cars on the street. It comes to a screeching halt in front of a building built entirely of steel. The doors open. 4 clowns and some kid in plain clothes pile out of the car.

Neb walks up to the giant steel door...the only one visible in the whole exterior of the building. Knock! Knock! Knock!

A small window in the door opens. "Whash do you w-w-wa-...need?" Slurs a voice from behing the door. A wave of noxious fumes follows the voice out.

"We're here for the clan game. We saw the sign stating that you were ready."

"Shine? Whaaare?" More brewery smells are emitted from within.

Mog holds up a sign the was previously staked in the front yard of the steel building. "This one. The one that says, 'BoS is ready for a clan game. Please knock on our door if you are also ready. All challengers welcome. First come, first Served. No waiting.'"

"Oooooooh...that one shine...didja read the sm-sm-sma...tiny wordzzzzzzz?" This statement was followed by a belch and more fumes.

Mog carefully examined the sign again. Sure enough, on the back of the sign in faint yellow lettering was the following..."by 'ready' BoS means that it will take all challenge proposals presented to it and decide how much effort they want to put forth for that opponent. This process may take anywhere from 2 weeks to 2 decades. Said challengers must all wait patiently, so as to assure that all necessary BoS players are actually 'ready.' BoS reserves the right to delay the start of the game as it sees fit. BoS claims that any such delay is necessary, and not simply stalling. Challengers to BoS must be 'ready' to start when BoS decides it is time to start. If said challenger is of the CoC clan, BoS reserves the right to use any tactic necessary to stall, delay, or otherwise slow the start time of said clan game."

"So, you're not ready, then?" Ask Nikolak...his painted on smile suddenly frowning.

There is commotion behind the door. Another voice speaks up, "we're ready. Didn't you read the sign? We're ready."

"Then, shall we proceed to the field of battle? Here's a map showing the battlefield layout, all resource locations, our intended strategy, our clan forum password, and some money for any incidentals you may have." Mog hands over a package through the window.

"Okay, we'll get back to you." The window closes.

The 5 gathered outside the door stare at each other, unsure of what to do. "I guess they're not ready." says Neb as they head back to the car.

"I heard that!" Says a voice from behind the door. "We're ready! We'll get back to you in a couple weeks!"

"Well, vj, I guess we have time to get your properly outfitted..."

wow... that was hillarious, Neb...

From behind the door

*cough*

2 weeks ... no way! ... I can't get back in shape in 2 weeks!

*sound of the whip*

1...up...*mphhh*...2...up...*huff*...*puff*...3...up...*slam* .... aaarrggg ... i need oxygen.

Well look it on the bright side ... that's 2 more push ups than yesterday!

VJ looks around the car nervously. All he can see is four large angry clowns, an extra pair of size 37 shoes, and large sign with "BoS is ready" on the front.

Where is all the candy he'd been promised? Where is the cute little toy poodle Mog had waved through window? Why do all the pedestrians run away screaming when they hear the honking of the clown car? For the first time vj realizes that not all clowns are the "funny" type. There are the scary clowns, the nervous clowns, the wise clowns, the berzerk clowns.

"He stole that sign!" whispers VJ to Coopels. "I know, I know" says Coopels. "He's just trying to make sure others are not mislead by it like we were. Plus, he's one angry little clown. See that huge frown he's painting on his face?"

VJ starts musing over the situation. Is it wrong to steal a sign with false information? Do two wrongs really make a right? How do such large shoes fit over those tiny little feet? Should he have gotten into this car???

A big yell breaks all the clown antics: "Open way for the paramedics ... "

*the paramedics look around the entrance and see all kind of circus gadgets lying around ... and a few clowns doing their usual clowny stuff*

The paramedics chat to each other as they head inside:

... why in the world are all this circus gadgets tossed around the entrance?.

... a clown picket fence?

... why all the clowns have angry frowns painted?

... who's that with hanging with the clowns ...

*from inside you can hear*

hang on gueritol ... just don't die on us ... not yet ... more training is comming.

aaaarrrggg ....

wow the clowns are anxious that's a pleasant surprise! well just hang on to your pantyloons guys the doughboy would like the priveledge of making pancakes at the circus bakery. However he will be having fun in the sun on the sand and the surf while we impatiently await his return(some guys have all the luck!). TRK will also be honored.

As for 'not' being ready I guess it's my fault I didn't expect I would have to play . I'm hoping to hear from wolff but if not I'll just have to dig around in my pockets and get a membership, so show a little patience and wol will gain a few bucks.

*gueritol's monitor*

blip ... blip ... blip ... blip

On the background he hears something about a kid ... he got a get well card ... with a clown in it!!!

blip.blip.blip.blip.blip.blip.blip

*gueritol rips the monitoring equipment, jumps out of bed and runs out of the hospital, never realizing his butt is fully exposed*