our tutu's are slate grey and we prefer hopscotch...followed by hops and scotch!

Can my girls I come visit for hops and scotch?

Deep in the forest, a scout from Mog's army enters Nebuchadnezar's hidden headquarters and reins in. He runs to the tent where Neb and his top generals are planning strategy and kneels before the august presence that is the mighty and revered Neb.

"Sire, I bring word from Mog!" he exclaims. "He wishes you to know he has... nothing to report."

"Good news!" cries Neb, "For this means no one has ascertained his whereabouts of yet and his nefarious and ingenious schemes can go ahead unhindered. How I marvel at the mandog's stealthy and arcane ways. The return message is 'good show, and keep on, faithful dogman'."

"As you command, sire" the messenger replies. "One other thing, your greatness, if I may be so bold as to mention it?"

"Yes, yes, what is it, man?" says Neb with asperity.

"Mog has requested that if you find any of "Princess in the Shadows" young girls in tutus... well, sire, this may seem rather indelicate, but he would like to sniff them in unmentionable areas, as is his wont to do. Could you please remand a few of them to his castle at your convenience?"

"He wouldn't want them, trust me, lad, they are rife with disease and parasites as all the kingdoms know. Tell him to make do with sniffing trees and barnyard animals, as is also his wont, capisch?" says Neb, slighty disgusted that such topics must be faced when allied with... such as he is allied with.

"Thank you sire, I will hurry back to report this to Mog." The messenger departs but as he leaves he thinks he hears a muttering of "...arse-sniffers and tail-waggers..."

lol Mog, ya sniffa! i tell you what mog, ive decided not to change my underwear until this game is over... then they are all yours!

*catapults a load of laundry at mogs castle!

Last Edited : Saturday, 27 June 2009 - 07:45

that must be why it was so easy to smell you all the way on the other side of the map simon i must smell like roses, my location still seems to be a mystery to EVERYONE, i want to play too guys. noise sensitivity isn't my specialty either i have been running around banging pots together, revving up the scouts, and calling cadence where did everyone go? i should have invested in cats on turn one, i see three undefended castles. If only i would have listened to my wife and let her spend the three hundred dollars on the fortune teller...

Last Edited : Saturday, 27 June 2009 - 13:04

There is moghair all over my lawn! And..and...EEEEEWWWWW, what was that I just stepped in??? In GOD'S NAME, Moggy, what have you been EATING????

you don't wanna know, Tub... you don't wanna know...

Well, whatever, it has lil bells in it, and smells like PEPPER SPRAY.

Burp.

"...stupid-dog-man tail waggin' flea ridden..."

"Sir!" A man interrupts Nebs mumbling. "Our neighbors...they, um...have arrived."

Neb looks up from his table in his castle tower. "I see. It looks like our neighbors, and our neighbors neighbors, and their neighbors...kinda looks like the whole map showed up for the 'kill Neb' party, eh?"

"And look! Some of them have even set up party tents already! I think I'm gonna like these neighbors...so friendly...if you don't count that spearmen incident on our southern borders. But I'm quite sure that was a mistake."

"Sir...um, those aren't tents." Said the soldier, scuffing his feet on the stone floor.

Neb pulled out his spyglass and eyed up the red-colored buildings and troops to the south. "Hm. Sure enough. Barracks. Well, maybe Mr. Pict's men just like to sleep in their own beds after a long party. At any rate, this is shaping up to be quite a party...and I haven't even sent the invites yet!"

Neb sits back down and resumes mumbling..."Where was I? Ah, yes, invite list. Okay, got the Mogs. Have to invite the VJs and Hankys or they'll probably throw a fit. I think Nyxon is a nice partier. Since Pict is already here, might as well officially invite him. Crazy seems to be on her way as well. And might as well invite their friend Klyph. That should do it."

Neb hands the invites to a scout nearby, and then starts another list. "Plates, silverware, roast pig..."

that blows i was hoping to crash the party, since i am invited i was wanting to know if i could add a few more names to the list. Better yet can you just put Klyph +2 on the guest list i kind of want them to be a suprise i wasn't able to buy you a gift and don't want you to think i am unappreciative.

Last Edited : Saturday, 4 July 2009 - 07:06

somebody woke the giant!

A soldier burst in yelling, "Commander Li, Commander Li! We've received word from Neb that we're being invited to a party!"

Her eyes narrowed at the soldier. "A party from Neb? Aw man... he always throws the lamest parties... ugh... fine, let's set up camp and round up the troops. It would be rude to ignore his invitation after all..."

"Set up camp HERE? Isn't that a bit dangerous?"

"Don't question me, soldier! They don't call me Crazy Li for nothing!"

"Erm... yes ma'm..."

The soldier quickly departed, leaving the commander to look over her wardrobe. "Now, what to wear..."

i wear nothing into battle but my cupid outfit and a hockey helmet!

Last Edited : Saturday, 4 July 2009 - 19:51

Nyxon looks up upon receiving Neb's invitation.

"I see Neb has sent his entourage, VJ and Hanky to my house, assuring I arrive to his party in style. A catapult eh? Perhaps they intend to launch me onto the scene."

It'll be a night to remember..

"Sire, sire!" the messenger bursts in breathlessly. There are some old-looking folks trying to break down our shiny new doors....

"What the...!?!" Pict responds. "That must be Neb!".

"Didn't you tell him about the surprise party we are organising for Simon as thanks for organising this bash????" he asks.

"Eeerrr...." the messenger responds hesitantly.

"Idiot!!!!!!!" Pict roars as the messenger beats a hasty retreat. You just can get the staff these days, he thinks to himself in despair......

Surprise party for me?
I hope its of a friendly nature...

Neb starts doing the moon walk singing thriller from the karaoke screen. vj and hanky acting as back up dancers. Crazy li and pict decide they are going to pretend to be the zombies from MJ's greatest music video of all time. Mog is enjoying the show his face half buried in a gold bowl of beggin strips. Mog starts to choke and looks up to neb. All of a sudden a big mess flies from mogs throat right into nebs face. Neb wakes up drenched in sweat shaking. He realizes it was just a dream. Out his window, higher than any bedroom window in all the land, he hears what he has for many a mornings now. His soldiers doing his bidding ever so gracefully. He spies one of his most coveted generals and smiles...

Through the cries of the enemies falling and their reinforcements war cries, one of nebs many talented generals has to listen closely.
"Why would a trumpet be sounding the call of the beginning of combat? We have been fighting for weeks at least!"

"Sir, sir! Our archers are screaming from atop the outpost, 'KLYPH HAS COME, SAVE THE WOMEN AND CHILDREN!!'"

"Calm down lieutenant. Have you not seen? We have legions of squires among us there is no way they could be such a threat!"

"But sir...."

"I said calm down!! Make sure the troops aren't sent into a panic, if our morale falls even an inch i will make sure you are blamed!"

Walking away the lieutenant wishes he could have told his general why he wasn't worried about being alive to take the blame. Only one thought crosses his mind, survival.... desertion.

Last Edited : Wednesday, 8 July 2009 - 05:27

"Nononononono!" Screamed Neb to himself as he surveyed his lands and men from atop an outpost. He turned and looked in a different direction..."Why did we block the gates? Stupid troops...can't get anything right..."

Just then there was a knock on the door, followed quickly by a bedraggled man climbing through the trap door of the Outpost. "Sir, you called?"

"Yes. This party has gone terribly wrong! You were in charge of perparations, were you not?" Said Neb calmly.

"Uh, party? Yes, uh, I was in charge." Replied the man with a confused look on his face.

"Well, you've totally screwed this up! First of all, you block the front and back entrances. How did you expect the guests to get in!?!"

"But, sir..."

"I'm not done! Then, when our guests couldn't get in and set up their own quarters to stay in, you went out and took one of them down!?!" Neb's face was starting to turn red. "And when I said to use the confetti launchers to shower our guests, I did not mean for you to attach sharp metal tips to long sticks and fire them!!" Neb's face was now a shade deep purple. "And I said choirs with beautiful chords should greet our guests...not SQUIRES with SHEILDS and SWORDS!!! This party will surely be known as the worst party ever!"

Neb collapsed onto the floor.

"Sir...if you hadn't noticed, they were attacking us. Our castle is in tatters, and we have very few men left with which to defend."

Neb looked up, "Of course it is a fight now. How would you feel being invited to a party, and not let in? What are we going to do with all this leftover ale?" Neb gestured to the building that had been holding 5000 casks of Mogale for the party. A building that was no longer standing.

"Ah! The ale! That's it! It's over. Cancel the party. Send everyone home. I can't show my face here...this is a disgrace. The neighbors will think I'm a total failure. I have to move..."

"What's the status on Neb's party?" Commander Li asked.

"Well, we had some difficulty," a soldier informed her?

"Difficulty...?"

"Well, yes... the doors were locked for some strange reason..."

"Did we arrive too early?"

"I can't say... there were signs that read 'Go Away!' hanging on the doors. It almost looked like we were unwanted..."

"That's strange. What did you have the men do?"

"We got impatient waiting, so we just busted down the doors to get in."

"Excellent idea! I like that!"

"But then we were greeted rather harshly... they shot arrows out of what appeared to be... confetti launchers..."

"That... was probably just a mix-up... I'm sure it was an honest mistake... could happen to anyone!"

"They also sent Squires..."

"How nice. An escort!"

"Not exactly, ma'am... the Squires just attacked us..."

"Well, that's no good... that's why you never send someone as inexperienced as a Squire to do this kind of thing. Neb should know better than that. They're always hungry to prove themselves as master warriors..."

"We now have word that they wish to cancel the party after this disasterous start..."

"Cancel?! That's terrible! I just got done picking out this stunning blue dress and you tell me there's not going to BE a party??? No, we are NOT having that. They is going to be a party if we have to break his whole castle down and start one ourselves! Forward march!"

"Er... uh... y-yes ma'am!" The soldier saluted and quickly hurried off.