One day Mister Jones found himself in the deep, dark woods, alone on a trail that slithered through the trees like a snake on a hunt. With his sword in its scabbard, his long knife in his hand, he crept along, not making a sound.

Ahead of him he saw a fire with figures sitting around and talking to one another. As he snuck up he began to make out what they were saying.

"I think an earthquake is just the thing!" exclaimed a huge man, gesturing with his gigantic hands. "They need earthquakes once in a while just to keep them on their feet."

"Sure, earthquakes are good and all, " a tiny, shriveled-up old man said. "but, for sheer destruction a flood is really the ticket, says me."

"Oh, crabnuts!" This came from a woman with fire in her eyes and bright azure hair. "You guys aren't even in the same planetary system with me! Here's what we do: light the air on fire! See if they keep on with their doin's after THAT!"

Mister Jones thought this must be a group of madmen and women, escaped from some institution, to be talking about such subjects, or maybe a coven of witches and warlocks met here in the root and mushroom forest!

He inched closer.

(to be continued)

"They never should have made me leave my home!" The huge man said.

"They never should have taken away my business!" The shriveled-up old man cried.

"They never should have eaten my puppy!!" the woman shrieked.

Mister Jones wondered just what he had stumbled upon. These people were mad and wanted revenge, apparently. He crept a but closer but just then a large badger walked up and asked him if he had a light.

"A light? You mean for a cigarette?" Mister Jones asked.

"No, it isn't for a cigarette, " the badger said, "it's to light the air on fire with."

Mister Jones really didn't like the sound of that echo of the woman's earlier threat.

"Uh, no, I sure don't, don't smoke, you know" he whispered.

The badger gave him what must have been an annoyed glance and walked into the area lit by the fire. "Some guy hiding back there" he mentioned casually.

(to be continued)

Last Edited : Monday, 8 August 2016 - 15:56

The huge man ran over and grabbed Mister Jones and dragged him to the fireside.

"What choo doing? " he bellowed into Mister Jones face. "You spyin' on us?"

"No! I was just walking along and fell asleep over there!" Mister Jones lied.

"What we gonna do with this one?" the giant man yelled.

"Let's just roast him up and eat him" the old man said.

"Wait, wait, I have a question for him first!" the woman exclaimed.

"Oh, alright, but then we eat him, yes?" the shriveled old man asked.

"Yes, yes, Connibur, we'll eat him after that. All right, you heard us talking, which way do YOU think we should end the world?" she asked.

(to be continued)

So the world ended. The End.